Are some people undeserving of kindness and niceness? Watch this X
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Morals, values, ethics - these are guiding principles instilled in our life the moment we start developing an understanding and perception of the world.
Our parents and the education system try to teach us what’s right, what’s wrong, and encourage us to live our lives in the best way possible.
This is why as a kid, or even a teenager, our view of the world’s largely black and white - something’s either good, or bad. Right or wrong. And we ourselves try to practice the good and right values, because we want to be a good person.
Then as we grow older, it can be surprising to discover that most things, most concepts, and even the values we’ve grown up with, are in fact, in shades of grey.
When we start seeing the shades of grey, It becomes harder to judge someone.
Whether someone is a good person or not a good person isn’t so easy to determine anymore, because we start to understand that the practice of our good values, and our good morals, are not to be used to categorise people, but to instead practice ourselves even when it’s challenging for us to do so.
It is when we still see the world in black and white that it becomes difficult to accept people who behave very differently from us.
We’re not even actively judging, because in our mind, we’re following through with the virtues of our morals. To us, it’s very clear that some people are undeserving of niceness or kindness.
It’s wonderful to have strong values, but it’s even more wonderful and beneficial to have strong values held loosely.
Values are our guiding principles in life, but they do not define us. Because a concept doesn’t define us, it is our actions that define us.
Someone who behaves rudely or unkindly may challenge our values, but it doesn’t change the foundation of who we are. It is our own negative or violent actions that shake our own foundation, it’s not other people.
If we can truly practice the virtues of kindness, patience and understanding, and not just embrace them as something that defines us, then it’s much easier to accept all the different shades of grey in this world, and be happy, always.