Stand Up For Yourself (Effectively)

What is the most effective way to stand up for yourself? Watch this! XO

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One of the best traits in life is learning how to be firm and compassionate at the same time.

When we're trying to stand up for ourselves, we often feel like we have to be a little aggressive, show a little anger.

So in a way, there are times where we feel like we have no choice but to be 'not nice', because when we're nice, people might think we can be pushed around and we don't want that. 

However, the practical truth is that we don’t have to try to be nice, and we don’t have to purposely be not nice to be effective.

When we try to be nice when we’re upset, it will often seem forced.

This is why even when we are trying to be nice to someone we don't agree with, they can often sense our frustrations and resentment bubbling underneath.
We can usually be nice until a certain extent, then we snap and lash out - it's like, "I've tried to be nice ok? And you're just being difficult, so I'm going to let you have it". 

We often have a goal when communicating with someone we find difficult, and forcing ourselves to be nice or losing our temper is not likely to help us achieve our objectives.

This is why the most effective approach is one where we are firm and compassionate. Firmness is not forcefulness. Being firm is about having the tenacity to communicate clearly and calmly without getting swept away by our emotions.

Communicating compassionately means that even if we feel the person is wrong, egotistical or difficult, we acknowledge that they are also just another human being.

Difficult people are not our enemy. Everyone is trying their best, and sometimes, our best and their best is just very, very different. 

Practicing firm and compassionate communication is the most effective way to help stand up for ourselves; and most importantly, it helps us let go of negative emotions and be happy, always.
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