When Loving Someone Is Unhealthy - Happiness Vlog

Don't let anything, not even love, rob you of your confidence and self-worth. Watch this Xx

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When we’re in an unfulfilling relationship, it’s very easy to think that our partner is the problem.

If your partner loves you but constantly makes you feel bad, puts you down, or says or does things that indicate that you’re not good enough, the problem is not you, it’s them.

Because if the problem is you, why wouldn’t they just exit the relationship? Why choose to keep staying with you?

When someone blames you or makes you feel worthless with their words or actions, it’s not because you are worthless, it’s because they have a hole within them that is causing them discontentment and dissatisfaction with life.

Don’t ever think that if you were ‘enough’, your partner would feel fulfilled.

When we feel lacking or want more from our life, there are holes that we hope to fill with the right relationship, the right job, the right life.

And when we do get that validation, success or pleasure, it will SEEM like our holes are filled - that’s when we think our life is awesome.

But the moment something shifts - a problem in the relationship, a disagreement at work... we’ll realise that the holes we have within us have only been temporarily plugged, because they start leaking again the moment external factors shift.

This is why love can be so amazing at the start and later we start to find it unfulfilling - because we’re not even aware that we’re using people as our temporary crutch to happiness.

Someone can help us be happy, but they cannot make us happy. Your partner’s fulfilment is entirely his or her own - a person who has their own issues, insecurities, ego, desire for validation or a need to feel relevant will not be content or fulfilled in any relationship.

Even if you are the most perfect being in this world, your partner still wouldn’t be happy being with you if they don’t know how to be content and fulfilled with their own life. Nothing and NOBODY can solve their deep-rooted issues for them, not even you or your love.

The thing is, life is so short that it’s so absolutely senseless to LET someone else rob us of our confidence, to allow someone affect us to the point of not feeling not as good as we used to feel. We can decide to stop letting it continue affecting us.

You can take back your life, in the sense that you just focus on working towards bettering and enriching your own life. Don’t let anyone steal your joy away from you. With or without this person in your life, you can be happy, always.

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